Monday, October 22, 2012

Presidential Debates

With the last debate coming tonight, at the same time as the Giants Cardinals game 7, I figured I might as well throw in my 5 cents about everything so far:
1. Post-debate coverage is stupid. I don’t know when the world started caring about body language experts and how *undecided voters felt during the debate.

2. Pre-debate coverage is literally the stupidest thing on TV. Studies have shown that listening to idiots make predictions kills brain cells and actually has a worse long-term effect on your brain than ecstasy.   
3. The moderator is useless. I’m pretty sure a trained monkey could do this job. Assuming it was nonpartisan. 
4. The debate itself is more useless. 
5. If you disagree with any of these points you've probably spent a lot of time pre and post-debate coverage to help you make your decision. 

Instead of trying to make the debates appear structured and meaningful they should just let it be. There should be no moderator and just one rule: 
The debate is not over until one of the politicians concede the last word to their opponent. 

The first few debates will last about 7 hours and viewers will stop watching after 30 minutes. However, once these politicians get to the point where they’re standing and  arguing for an exhausting 7 hours to a stadium that has long since been vacated they will realize that they’re going to have to change their ways. These are grown men. If they can’t figure a way to speak to each other in an efficient manner without a moderator then they shouldn't be in office. If these verbose blow hardy politicians cannot make the change, then people will start tuning out the 8 hour debates and start listening to only those that are quick and to the point. Maybe we’ll have a shot of breaking up our two-party dictatorship.  

Ryan's pre-debate preparation

Also, I would add a room full of fact checkers and every time one of them made an erroneous statement a bucket of green slime will be dropped on their heads, a la Double Dare. 
That being said, if you don’t live in Ohio then your vote doesn't really count anyway.

*watching the Fox news post-debate analysis is the best. They go to their test group of about 30 old white “undecided” voters and ask them questions. Every single one of them says bad things about Obama and good things about Romney. And that this debate has helped them make a “decision” and it’s clear that Romney should be president. 

Palin winning over voters with the talent portion of the debate

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